Hi -
We have been wanting to tell the kids for a while now and finally had a talk with them yesterday. they are 6 & 9. It went very well - our purpose was to open the door to a dialogue and to validate feelings that they may be having about their dad that they don't understand - feelings that they may be drawing their own erroneous conclusions about. It was short - they asked a few questions and back to playing. The door is now opened and I am very relieved.

Thanks to so many here for contributing their experiences - it is priceless info that I couldn't get anywhere else.

Hope:

so glad the experience was a good one. The beauty of young children is their ability to be resilient. I am glad that the door is now opened and you can feel some relief from that part of dealing with the disease. I am hoping to have a good experience but considering the older ones age I am concerned.

K

Hope, I'm so glad you told them. I'll bet it feels like a weight off your shoulders. You were smart to keep the discussion short. They now know the door is open if they want more information. I am thinking I'll wait a bit to talk with my son since there are no real outward symptoms here yet. But it makes me feel anxiety and like I'm keeping secrets which isn't really right. When the time comes, I will be relieved when I talk with him...although I dread that too.

Hi Eve -
I also felt no need before my husband was symptomatic - that felt right... there just didn't seem to be a good enough reason. Opening the door and giving some validation for feelings and observances is really what our goal was so we feel very good about it... How old is your son? You will know when the time is right and it will be a relief - probably for all of you...

My son is 6 and was diagnosed with autism at a young age. But he is very high functioning (they say Aspergers). I recently told him his autism diagnosis and I did it for some of the same reasons you told your kids. Mainly so he wouldn't have wrong assumptions (he was saying, "I'm a bad boy.) and so he'd understand himself and how he reacts to situations better. I think you're right about knowing when the time is right to disclose this information. I also feel positive you're right that it will be a relief. I'm glad it went well for you. Thanks for sharing Hope2. You have a lot of wise and insightful observations and advice.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/12/2011 07:47AM by eve.

Good for you, Hope. I'm glad it went well. It must be a huge weight off your shoulders to have introduced the topic to your children.