Just wondered if anyone had any ideas for this situation.

My husband is 60 and has had HD probably since 45 (or before) where there was a slight visible physical movement.

He hasn't worked the last 9 years. He does very well as far as is able to take care of himself, etc. It takes him longer to get ready for the day but he is able to do everything so we feel very fortunate. He does need help in sorting his pills, I do the bills, etc. but that is fine as I have always done those things. I try to get him out quite a bit to visit our children, visit friends or go to a lake.

2 1/2 years ago he was diagnosed with a sinus infection. He had never had this prior. He has had a few sinus infections since then. Shortly after the first one he said that problem was in our house - that he does not have problems anywhere else but at our home of 35 years. He always says he has cannot breathe at our home but no where else - this is constantly he says and not just during the infections.

I do notice that when we have company or he gets involved in something he seems to forget his breathing problems and, of course, he can breathe or he wouldn't be here. The only thing he does all day is get himself ready and I have tried to get him to do other things which I think would help him but he says he has too much to do, etc. Once in awhile he does something. My thought is that he has too much time to think. I would have trouble with that if it were me I know. I know the sinus infections are real but don't think they are due to our home but I wish I knew for sure.

Anyway, 1 1/2 years ago we had him go through allergy tests. He thought for sure our house is full of dust mites (he read an article or heard something on this at that time) so he knew this was the reason for his breathing problems. He did fine on the allergy tests including the one for dust mites. His thought after the tests has been that they were not performed correctly.

The dr has said that some people get sinus problems as they get older. His mother has sinus problems once in awhile as well. The dr has told him that the problem could be in the house but is more likely outside and that sometimes people will never know why they have those problems.

We have gone through my husband opening windows in the middle of the winter saying it helps his breathing. I have told him we cannot afford to heat the outside and we have gone around and around on this. He has gotten somewhat better on this but we have also purchased two air purifiers which he said helped at first but now he is saying they are not as effective either and that is it the house.

He has stated the last couple years that we need to move to another house so he can breathe. This is stressful because that is a huge move, we do not know if our home would sell in this market, do not know where I would want to move due to my job which I have and want to keep,
it would take alot to move including getting rid of many things prior and I have more than enough to do with working, helping him, taking care of the house, etc.

We have talked about moving closer to our children but that would mean quite a distance and I don't know if I could transfer. I am also not sure I want to transfer to that location as the dynamics of my job would change dramatically and here I am very flexible about being able to take my huband's calls through the day, run home to help him if need be and the drs know him and are very good with him. We would lose all of that with a move. I do not want to move into a house in the same area in case the same problem would crop up with him. We also have neighbors we have known for years and they are good with him.

He has talked in the past about moving out immediately and once was going to stay at a motel. I told him we couldn't afford that long term and that it wasn't an option. I can usually talk him out of something or get his mind off of it but in this scenario I am not able to totally keep him from it.

I think he is open to staying with one of our children or one of my relatives closeby but I fear doing that in that I might not get him to move out of their place and wouldn't want that to happen either.

He is on zyprexa, zoloft and clonazepam for HD which have helped a great deal.

I have alot of issues here. I wish I knew if anything in the house was triggering his troubles. I don't know that I want to change out all carpet in case that doesn't work. I also wonder if some of the problem that he attributes to breathing might be the progression of HD and that the problem actually has more to do with his throat closing up as he is having some problems with eating once in awhile. I don't know that for sure either.

If he actually has problems with breathing and it is in our house I would feel awful not doing anything.

I just wondered of anyone has dealt with anything like this and if you have had luck with anything or if you have any ideas you might share.

Thank you.

It's not the house.

I believe it's an obsession with him and at this point I don't think it's going to change with medication. You COULD tell him while he's at your kids house that they found the problem, and you had people in and they totally got rid of all the mold and such. You could even work up a bougus receipt on the computer if you want to prove what was done. got rid of dust mites and mold and totally detoxified your house. Tell him you even had to stay at a motel over night while they did their work. Then print out a guarrentee for 20 years. Bring him home after that, maybe that will work. Pat

Do you have a porch or patio or deck that you might convince him to step out onto for a bit - rather than open the windows and heat the outdoors?

jl

jl
We do have a patio with one open side to the outside and he has, on occasion, gone out there but doesn't very often.
He feels he would rather open windows than end up in the hospital or sick and does this when I am at work and I usually find open windows when I come home.
Our weather in the winter gets very cold so that option isn't all year but does work in the nice weather.
Thank you for your reply-the weather is getting nicer and I think at that time outside or opening windows will work.

Pat-
I also liked your idea. I was going to try something like that once but he decided not to have the house fixed but rather move. He is still very intelligent but does have glitches and has a vehicle he drives although rarely. He also is very strong at times about his thoughts although I am so thankful for the medications or sadly he wouldn't live here.

One thing I noticed I left off the original post in looking at my notes-
we do have about 4 pieces of drywall in our unfinished basement that have a small amount of mold on the bottom of each which was caused by water in our basement probably 20 years ago. He never replaced them. At the time I did take a clorox mix and wash those areas down and they have not grown but I know I need to get them out of there. When this started with him I have attempted to get a couple contractors out to tear them down and replace them when he is gone but they promise to show up and then have not.

I will get it done in the very near future and will call until I get someone who will do it or I will try to do it myself and have him stay with our children while I do it.

Thank you for your replies.
Sharon

Shar,
My husband also can obsess about a particular topic. When he gets to the point where he is losing sleep about his obsession and no matter what I can do to convince him he is still obsesses. I know it?s time to ask his doctor to adjust his medication. It?s gotten to the point I do not share everything with him as something minor may cause him to obsess. As an example he is very into computers as he was a computer programmer. My daughter told me he lap top isn?t working, I told her not to let her dad know, otherwise he will drive me crazy worrying about her computer.
When he starts obsessing and worrying it like living with a 2 year old you can?t reason with him.

I find it helps to find someone besides myself to address my husband?s obsessions. I like Pat's solution. It may relieve his mind if he thought he received an unbiased opinion. I know this sound deceitful but many times I find it easier not to tell my husband the truth about things or to change the details so he won?t obsess about thing. Many times I told him the truth and I could of kicked myself because he would become anxious and start obsessing and would bug me about the problem. It?s gotten to the point that I don?t mention anything to him that is going to cause him to anxious, he does not have the necessary coping skills anymore and worrying just makes his HD worse and my life miserable.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 03/23/2009 01:12AM by Debra.

I agree with Eric?it is not the house. And I think that if you move you run the very high risk of his being extremely unhappy about the move later. Most state (and county and local) governments have some department that is responsible for environmental safety. They can check air quality.

Early on when Tony was first showing symptoms, he had severe headaches. They were not migraines but the doctors could not find a reason for them. I contacted the health department in my county and they brought out electronic instruments and set them up in our house for several days. They took samples of the air in our house to be evaluated for toxins.

I actually thought Tony was having an allergic reaction to the chemical that was used to treat termites here, but they did not detect that chemical and found nothing unusual. I think in some cases headaches are a symptom of HD.

You might consider trying to do this at your house. Your husband might believe it if it comes from a governmental entity. And if there is something it could be fixed. Or perhaps you could claim that they fixed the problem. One of the most difficult things about being a caregiver is the necessity of being untruthful. It has taken me a long time to learn that I should not share a truth with Tony that will make him obsess and worry. If I have to create some story to keep him from doing that, well then, so be it.

Debra and Maggie-
Thank you for your words of wisdom.

I have had to be untruthful or just not tell everything which I still find extremely hard and wrong to do although I know you are right.

I will have to be alot more careful about saying things to him that are minor but cause him to worry which I have seen more of lately.

I will check with our health department and see if there is something they can measure on air quality - that would be great if they did so I would actaully be assured the air is ok and that I would be assured the problem is not the house but my husband (which I guess I know deep down anyway) but that is something I would like to check into.

Eric, Pat, JL - again thank you for your words of wisdom as well. It all is a definite help.

I will put in play your thoughts.

Hope you all have a great day and thank you again.
Sharon

I agree with the others, sounds like it's not just a house problem.

If you do plan on trying to get some things done around the house for the appearance of "fixing" the dust mite problem he views, I do know there are companys that will vacuum and clean out all your ac/heating duct work. That might be something your phd would view as beneficial to the dust mite situation. It can be good for better air quality also. You could also have a sytem wide air-filtration system installed. Maybe an alternative to moving and if nothing else the air-filtration unit would increase the value of your home if you do have to sell in the future. My mother has a sytem wide unit and she runs those filters through the dishwasher all the time and is amazed at how it helps her allergies. Maybe he could be in charge of making sure the filters are cleaned regularly and he would feel he was managing the situation.

My phd will want a particular thing attended to that just wears me out, but if I say "fine" it's your responsiblity to get it done...seems like now I guess it wasn't that important after all. He wanted the dog to stop sleeping on the bed (one of them has slept at the foot of the bed for the longest time and now & all of a sudden he doesn't want it there). I said "fine" tonight you need to make a nice cushy bed real thick for the dog on the floor (she has arthritis) and the dog will now be made to stay there.

3 months later and still no cushy dog bed on the floor but I haven't heard another thing about it since I left the "ball in his court".

Just a thought! Good luck.

Hi Shar,
Have you thought of purchasing an air purifier? Maybe a small unit that sits close to his favorite chair?

I realize this won't "fix" the long term obsession, but maybe will ease him a bit until you can get his meds adjusted or figure out a better solution.

My PHD seems to be sensitive to the dry air in the winter. He was so obsessed with "putting moisture" in the air to the point he would boil large pots of water on the stove for hours at a time. This drove me nuts because I was always worried he'd forget the pot and it would boil dry. Sure enough at 3 am one night I woke to the smoke detector going off. He had gotten up, put the pot on the stove then fallen asleep in the chair. No fire but a good amount of smoke from the dry pot.

I was so angry I couldn't see straight. We have a humidifier, but he kept saying it wasn't working good enough. The next day I went out and bought a humidifier with an "air purifier" and set it as close to his easy chair as possible. I don't think it works any better then the old one but the cute blue led light and digital numbers telling him the moisture in the air seem to have calmed him down.

He's never "boiled" another pot of water since and I can finally sleep a little easier.

Good luck!

This is what I would do. I would put him on a non-sedating, long-acting antihistamine such as reactine or allegra (but I wouldn't suggest claritin/loratidine as it has occasionally been associated with dystonia). Put him on it for 4 weeks straight, every day. Also ask your doctor at the same time for an inhaled nasal corticosteroid spray and use it regularly for 4 weeks straight too (these take up to 2 weeks of regular usage to get a peak effect). If this is related to allergies in any way, you should notice a difference. If not, I would suggest a referral to an ENT - to determine if he has any nasal polyps, which can be easily cauterized if need be.

HTH,

Yes, i agree with Kelver...these posts have bothered me just a little. Yes, it can be obsession with him, but he's still a person, and other things should be ruled out first. People with hd can have weaker immune systems, and react to something in the house that others wont notice. I have had asthma for many years, and had my allergies figured out so well that i didnt need any asthma meds for over 10 years. Then suddenly my asthma started bothering me, every day, 24/7. An inhaler was not enough, pills were not enough, it was getting really bad, and meds werent taking care of it. This went on for several weeks. It was always worse when i was in the house, and could not figure it out. I asked my husband, has anything new been brough into the house, are you using a new aftershave, anything, and he insisted there was nothing new. One day i decided to hunt down what was going on, in our attached garage, which we often kept the joining door to our living space open, he had brought home a nice bucket of fiberglass that a friend had given him!!! It didnt even have a lid, it was covered in saran wrap!!! My doctor was livid when she heard this, she said have him throw that away immediately!!! Well guess what, my asthma went away immediately. Did anyone else in the family get sick from it, no, just me, but that's cus i was already susceptible to asthma. I just think in all fairness, if someone was saying their phd is obsessive compulsive, they are a germ freak and everything has to be lysoled and everything else, or they will freak, i could understand some of the responses here, but, he is having trouble breathing! It doesnt matter what is causing it, it has to be fixed. If it turns out it's psychological, he still has to be able to breathe, so then a tranquilizer might fix that, but, if it's an allergic reaction, then his body is not getting enough oxygen, and that is not good. Shar has said they have mold in their basement, and is going to have that fixed, yes, get that fixed up for sure. Don't everyone just go on the oh its ocd and let's just trick the phd. That is the last resort, after first finding out if their really is a problem. And yes, it is possible for him to be having a reaction to something in the home that others arent reacting too, just because with hd, we tend to have weaker and more sensitive immune systems. And Shar, i know you are great, you are awesome, and this must be stressful, and i think what you said about fixing the mold problem is a good step in the right direction. Sorry guys, but the rest of you are just wrong, unless, all alse has been checked out first hehehehehehe, sorry Eric and pat, just wrong, the idea is a good one, but the timing is not right, good idea, IF all else had been eliminated first, but dont just right away decide we will just fool the phd



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/23/2009 06:33PM by Barb.

OK Barb, I bow to your expertise, my idea after all else fails, you are correct on this!

mrspatwolf Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> OK Barb, I bow to your expertise, my idea after
> all else fails, you are correct on this!

hehehehehhe

Hi,
I appreciate everyone's replies a great deal. Alot of knowledge and different directions to look at which is good.

We do have two air purifiers and for the last year he felt they were the answer and now he says they do not work.

He has been taking Allegra daily for probably 6 months or better now. He has used an antihistamine at times prior as well.

He does say he has trouble breathing, however, when we have company he seems to have no problems at all - that is why I somewhat wonder.

However, Barb you bring up a good point and one I always try to consider-because he has HD he may be more prone to certain things and each individual is different anyway. That is what is always so hard-I would never want to second guess him because I do not know what he actually feels like. But, before I try a couple different things I want to rule out what I can. Wouldn't it be wonderful if our bodies could be hooked up to a machine and the machine send out the code as to what is wrong like they do cars!!

Thanks everyone!

My check engine light would be on all the time...

I would say that you just have to do all you can to change his mind that this house is the cause of all his ills.

Moving isn't an option.

My guess is that this won't last very long. Maybe a month or so. Something else will come along to obsess over.

Hope things work out for both of you.

Good Luck,

Edwina



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/08/2009 07:58AM by Edwina.