Well i had my moment of glory yesterday...yup...my moment in the sun. It was so pitiful it was beyond pitiful lol In my 50 years of life, i do not think i've ever had a more surreal moment like this, where i did not know whether to laugh or cry lol, oh it was bad lol
Sooooo...we're driving out to pick up elisa to come stay the weekend with us, but well, having hd, well, incontinence has been becoming a problem lol not like i just wait too long, no, more like i just not aware i gotta go, until i really have to go! lol
sooooo lol yep it was a good one...
we're like only 10 mins to elisas place
i say, oh think i have to go soon...dan says well can you wait? Im like oh sure honey, no problem lol lol Well heres a gas station...oh no im fine...well heres another gas station...oh no, im fine, really i am, and of course, i really thought everything WAS fine lol, well,
finally we're only one block from their place, yup, beautiful bright sunny day...lots of traffic on road...people everywhere...no bushes in sight, just traffic on the left, and a playground on the right, yup, with children playing...and i start screaming lol pull the car over!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dan says where? what? here????!!!!!!! im like YES HERE!!! NOW!!!!!!!!!!!! lol he says theres children playing!!!
hes like oh my god!...slams on the brakes...yup, here i am 50 years old, in the most pitiful state of my life, no bushes, traffic on one side of me, whizzing by, and a playground of children on my other side, and in my hysterical predicament trying to decide, who should i moon?????????? The ongoing traffic or the playground!!!!! oh yeah, it was bad, one of those surreal moments in time where you realize you have been lowered to the most pitiful form of humility that can ever be experienced lol lol oh yeah, I decided it would be better to moon the traffic than the children lol so dans screaming hurry up, theirs kids here!!!!! get in the car!!!!! So, uhmmm, yup, got in the car, pants still down, door still open, and i never seen dan take off like a bat outtta hell like he did then!!!!! It was the most priceless pitiful thing i have ever seen, the look of sheer horror on his face as he hit that gas pedal, like ive never seen him do before lol lol lol As he hit the gas pedal, and i saw the look on his face, i realized, ok, this is really really funny lol rggg, yup, 50 years, and this was my moment in the sun



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2008 02:50AM by Barb.

Barb,

I have to give you credit for a great attitude. My wife says this is a humiliating disease--and it is. I did notice that there was a full moon the other night.

By the way, my wife has the same problem. There is no such thing as waiting. If you have the faintest urge, take care of it. Do not pass a gas station and do not try to pass GO and collect $200.

My recommendation. For trips, wear Depends with a extra absorbency Poise pad insert. I also place incontinence pads on the car seat, in case the first two do not absorb everything. I do not want not see you behind bars and on the predator registry.

And carry a container of Wet Ones (wet wipes or whatever they are called) so you can discretely clean yourself when you get to your destination.

How is this for Hints from Heloise? (from a guy no less)

Wait until Dan has to do the cleaning.

Dave

lol that's funny. They should do a comedy show about a family with HD. Would be hilarious. I know my dad did some really funny things.

[www.hdyo.org]

Barb, Only you could make something so serious sound so funny. You should have been a comedian. I wonder what those in the passing cars thought?

I have always carried extra panties in my purse. There have been a few times when my daughter has needed them suddenly like at the doctors and the secet female bond is renewed. After 4 pregnancies, I had a weak nether region. When my feet get cold I pee...a problem getting out of the pool. When I have to pee, I cannot walk.
Pretty generally I stay at home until I perform so I can clean at home. It isn't a fixation, it is simply easier to clean up accidents in the shower and before spreading it around. I also had the babies diaper wipes here and tried them but I find them not good enough for Nanna. I get white terry facecloths when they cost abut 25 cents at Walmart and wash the cloth visibly clean after and hang it to dry. After being used as a butt cloth when it looks grungy it becomes the lower bathroom rag. In my bath room the coloured face cloths are for the face and body and the white ones are for the bum.
My marriage vows had nothing about this sort of thing and my life out of any institution will probably be over should my hubby have to do this sort of thing. SO I take care of it.
I also keep the layers of clothing simple so there is less to contend with. If you have panties and tights on it is much harder to deal with it.
Who should I moon?
Dusty

Barb,

That was a priceless story. If you want to move (pardon the pun) to the next level, you might consider buying this book. [www.kathleeninthewoods.com]

Did you remember your sunscreen? :-)

Will

If it helps Barb, I have a story of my own. I spent one July 4th doing the patriot walk in Boston. Unfortunately the park guide forgot the key to the public bathrooms. Restaurants were closed and the woman staffing the giftshop at the North Church refused to let me use the staff bathroom. We took the subway back to the hotel but got off one stop too early and had to walk some more. I thought I would make it my room in time, but as we passed the Christian Science Monitor building, I tripped over an irregularity in the sidewalk. So I didn't moon anyone, but I did wet my pants,

Poor Barb! Daves right though, for trips Depends, they sell the pull up kind; they look like underpants, and Depends also makes a booster pad which can be bought at your favorite store, Walmart. As a matter of fact someone on this board suggested them a while back (the pads, that is) and we found out the only store in our area that carries them is Walmart.

Great story, Barb!

It certainly lends new meaning to Martin Luther King's quote - "the fierce urgency of NOW"...........


But on the serious side - you simply must sit Dan down and explain to him that "Can you wait?" is not a reasonable thing to ask of a PHD.

You're not alone Barb. I don't have HD. I once had a terrible bladder infection, and had an hour-long bus ride hom from work. I held it and held it and held it until I got off the bus and was about 20 feet from my front door, and I realized that no amount of will power was going to keep the dam shut anymore. I felt my bladder let go. It was still light out, and anyone could have seen the pee streaming down my pant leg. So I stood next to a bush and pretended to forage through my purse, looking for something, while I peed all over myself. Most of the pee made it to the soil beside the bush, but I DID have to throw my shoes out that night. They were soaked. It was really a humiliating moment. It happened 10 years ago, but I remember it like it was yesterday.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2008 12:30PM by bellasalsera.

Only you could make us all laugh about incontinence!!!! Youre one of kind!!!!
love ya

DCB
*Living for today*

POISE, what a perfect name for a perfect product, I wear one every day.. I am NOT a Phd, but I'm 57 and you just never know when my husband will get me hysterical laughing.. ya, poise,, I always ALWAYS wear one!

Oh man, this reminds me of the time I "went postal" in my small town post office after dark. As I sorted my mail at the counter in the empty PO box area, I realized I had to go...so badly that I could not move...and so I did. Left a huge puddle on the floor. I didn't want to drive in that condition. Luckily my house was just across the way. I walked and left my car. During the night I worried about my car linking me to the scene of the crime. This was a federal building after all--would I be charged with an act of terrorism with my biohazardous waste?

It is true--like Dusty said--HD messes with your ability to control your muscles. Sometimes we have to choose to control one set over another and just let the other go to hell--with disasterous consequences. : )

Margie

Ok, Barb....
I can't believe you actually told all of us, but I'm so glad you did. I have to get this out really quick. So, please forgive me if someone already mentioned this. Did you see the movie "The Bucket List"? If not, watch it...one point that was made in the movie that every man over 50 should know (I think every woman should take note as well):
1 - Don't EVER pass a restroom without using it!
2 - Don't EVER waste a hard-on!
3 - Don't EVER trust a fart!

Hope that doesn't offend anyone.

Bless ur heart for sharing that Barb! I almost wet myself just picturing the passers by faces!x



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/01/2008 04PM by lou_22x.

lol you guys are too funny lol

WELL, I WASNT GOING TO MENTION THIS... BUT...

2 months ago, in the middle of that horrible flu, i had a fit at work while loading a plane with passengers.

i had one of those, coughing, gagging, gasping, wheezing, breathless, bent over coughing fits, and guess what?
at the same time i was trying to "CLENCH'...
that was a big no go...

one of the more embarrassing moments at work, way worse than getting drunk at the christmas party...

Well, getting drunk at the Christmas party, you at least have one advantage.

You don't tend to remember much of it..............

Love all you stories, you guys! Maahearna, did you hurry out next mornin g to retrieve your car? Hope no men in black came to visit you, haha.

Barb, I have a similar story of traveling in the car, no gas station for miles, almost to our destination, can't wait, pull over, pull over, and my husband found a sort of island off the freeway where there were a few skimpy trees and bushes, ah, the relief. The relief seemed worth the embarassment.

OKAY MY ADVICE TO EVERYONE WHILE IN A CAR:

CARRY A GIANT CUP OR PLASTIC CONTAINER, YOU CAN AT LEAST JUMP OVER THE SEAT AND SQUAT...

IT WORKS, I KNOW...